Day 41- Tomorrow is for real

Ugh... I feel nasty, bloated... like a marshmallow in a microwave - have you ever seen that? It's ridiculous it's so huge and big and slimy- full of fat, melty, sticky stuff... and you really just don't have any idea what to do with it... I mean it's definitely too big to put on a graham cracker. Well now that you have that glorious image in your head - imagine it with my head on top... and there you have it folks, that is my Sunday. Tomorrow is THE day. Like THE one that I expect will change my life forever. So I have been eating and drinking whatever and whenever I wanted today, you know... in preparation for mega weight loss ;) it's how I roll. I just went to the store and stocked up on all the veggies, meat and beans that you could possibly want in a weeks worth of meals. As the cashier rang up can after can of pinto beans and kidney beans and garbanzo beans (etc) I felt the need to explain myself to him... like why anyone could ever want that many different types of beans in their life. Instead I just smiled and paid. I know he totally thought I was a weirdo ... that probably farts a lot.

I went home and we cleaned out the pantry and the fridge ridding our lives of all those big nasty carbs (that I love oh so much, oh too much) and the chocolate ... oh the perfectly good chocolate. However, there is one last pint of Haagen Dazs Chocolate Peanut Butter with my name ALL over it... it's my one last splurge after my bubble bath soak. Trust me... it's important. Why on earth does my favorite ice cream on the planet have to be the worst ice cream for you, literally... it's the worst... read my blog a few posts back. Anyways - I just wanted you to know that I was serious and prepped and ready for next week.

Motivation... like the general population I need motivation to do things. Sometimes I just have to motivate myself to be happy... not that I'm depressed about anything... but sometimes, when you are like me and you have a MASTER'S DEGREE in something you LOVE but you are still wiping poop off kid's butts and cleaning green snotty boogers off kid's faces for A LIVING you need a little more motivation than the typical person. So I'm making myself a morning motivational CD. Yes, you heard that right. I need something that will kick my butt in gear in the morning, get me moving and especially SMILING. I need to smile more, it's good for my soul. And although when I belt out "Come on baby, make it hurt so good... sometimes love don't feel like it should" it doesn't seem "HAPPY" it totally is - I mean that song ROCKS and it makes me feel happy inside. And that's important.

Tomorrow I begin. I will weigh myself in the morning and I will let you know what the results are next week... wish me luck!!!!!!!

Day 34

Well, it's been ONE MONTH - and I've lost a total of 7 pounds... not much to brag about... but hey it's not zero pounds so I'm gonna take it. I haven't really been good about posting on here and I am going to do better, however, I am going to do it a little differently. Someone VERY smart says to "Take the pressure off and make a small change"... words to live by. Another little quote of wisdom currently taking over my life - "The decent method you follow is better than the perfect method you quit" so taking these into consideration I am altering the way I hold myself accountable by way of blogging. I am going to check in and post ONCE A WEEK - probably during the weekend. Every now and again I may get the chance to post more than once but don't hold your breath.

I'm about to drop some knowledge on you.... I don't even know if you are ready for this.... are you? You remember how my friend Jessica said to get the book The Four Hour Body?? Well, she is my new favorite person because this book is RIDICULOUS. I mean it's quirky (by that I mean my kind of humor), it's smart (by that I mean sometimes I have to read a paragraph a few times because this guy is so intelligent and I don't want to miss one single word) and it's LIFE CHANGING.... did you get that part... it's important... it will CHANGE YOUR LIFE. So I'm telling you right now if you want to lose weight get off your big ole dimply butt and BUY this book. I went to Barnes & Nobel online and it was $17... yet in the store it's $27... but :) if you have a Kindle (which you should totally have) then it's only $12. The average - AVERAGE - person that reads his book and uses his information looses 20 pounds within weeks. Um... I don't know about you but I'll pay $12 for that. A lot of it is information that you probably already know, but he explains it in a very interesting way and trust me there is A TON in there that you have no idea about. It's completely worth it. Really. Go buy it.

So not THIS week... but next week I'm starting this AVOID white things thing. Meaning I must avoid: all rice (even brown), all breads, cereal, potatoes, pasta (terrible, terrible idea), tortillas and anything fried with breading. This is going to SUCK, it is... I hate it already - but it will be so completely worth it when I'm rockin my bathing suit this summer. Did you know (I do because of this awesome book I'm reading) that this chlorine dioxide chemical used to bleach flour combines with residual protein in most of these foods to form Alloxan - researchers use Alloxan to INDUCE DIABETES in lab rats.... seriously!?!? I mean they left that little snippet of info off the label. That should totally be a surgeon general's warning.

Items that must be included in my menu now: chicken breast or thigh, beef (grass fed), fish, pork, organic eggs, lentils, black beans, pinto beans, red beans, soybeans, spinach (yeck!), asparagus, peas, broccoli, Green beans... you get the picture.

I'm going to be saying NO to FRUIT... oh yeah! It contains FRUCTOSE, which is converted to glycerol phosphate more efficiently than almost all other carbohydrates.
Glycerol phosphate > triglycerides > fat storage (no thank you!)

I'm going to be saying NO to DIET SODA... why? Aspartame can stimulate weight gain.

I'm going to designate Saturday as my "Dieters Gone Wild Day". I'm going to eat whatever I want to eat and it's going to be heaven. Because dramatically spiking caloric intake in this way 1x per week increases fat loss by ensuring that your metabolic rate doesn't downshift from extended caloric restriction. (sounds smart right) And to help with my cravings throughout the week I'm going to keep a notebook around so when I have a craving I'm going to write it down and know that I can eat it on Saturday.

This is just A LITTLE of the ways I'm going to change my diet. So we will see if it works...